I’ll Stay Single, Thank You Very Much…

When destined to be alone  it is totally best to revel in the solitude. In order to truly appreciate it, all I have to do is listen to all the couples I know when they fight over dumb crap and be glad that I don’t have to deal with their dilemmas.

I am very serious. Every couple I know either got together out of some sense of a need for a living arrangement or they got together because of outside pressures that “they’d be good for each other”. I am sorry but any relationship that is not based on a mutual attraction in the beginning that leads to some sort of pseudo commitment with no love  is nothing but a lie in the making and if there is any love whatsoever, it is usually one-sided. “Arrangements that make sense” are just not my thing. That’s a business arrangement not a relationship.

These are the same individuals who think my life is “broken” and needs “fixing”. No thank you. I spent over half my life married and have no desire to commit to anyone again.  I have no interest in meeting the person one thinks would be so “good for me” because in fact that is being based on what is good for THAT person engineering this whole thing in his or her own mind. To that I would say I am not you. I have my own needs and desires and if I go out with anyone it will be of my choosing, not yours. If that person is so good to you, then dump your significant other and go out with him yourself…I’m not interested. Capiche?  I feel like I’m being pimped out when someone tries to set me up like that and I totally detest it.

Every couple I know fights over money, or the fact that one has to work long hours to make the money to pay for that house or whatever the other person wants, but then they get mad because they feel they don’t get enough attention once the novelty wears off of the relationship. Relationships take work. I learned that a long time ago. After two strikes I’m not going for a 3rd. Unlike a contestant on “Who Wants to be a Millionaire?” I know when to take what I’ve got and walk away. I’m not willing to kiss any more friggin’  frogs and I’m not looking for a prince because to me there is no such thing as real, romantic love. If there were, there wouldn’t be so many bloody divorces…

Here is the PERFECT singles ad for me if I were going to put one up: “Hey guys! If you are looking for a woman who looks like Cindy Crawford, cleans like Alice on “The Brady Bunch” and cooks like Julia Child, you are shit out of luck with me.”  At least I can say I am honest. I do not need anyone to “take care of me” and I certainly don’t need a partner to validate who I am.

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