Political Correctness Truly Defined (Part 3)

In this part I will focus on an aspect of political correctness that needs to be addressed in society as a whole. It is how members of our society try to force the entertainment community to conform to their own expectations, freedom be damned.  I am referring to people who have a compulsion to condemn an artist for the words he or she writes or speaks.

On one hand, it would seem legitimate on the surface to condemn someone for remarks they feel are cruel and insulting toward political figures and other celebrities based on things they cannot help. The problem with this point of view is that it is often a delusion. Most people in the public eye put themselves there and they don’t care what those who oppose them think. In fact, they don’t even watch or hear those views, so for someone to rise up to the defense of someone they do not even know and try to crush the career of such a person seems to be rather pointless because their fans are loyal. Short of a national scandal, the audience will not abandon those they adore either.

However, when one stops to think about it, the question that needs to be asked is “Why is this of concern to them?”  In the first part of this series, I referred to Joan Rivers’ outspoken humor.  For many her humor in later years was not well-received by some people,  yet her fame continued to rise like a meteor. I can explain why that is.  She represented another generation entirely. It was as if in the present, anything resembling America of the past is becoming unacceptable by modern members of society. The fact of the matter is that many still keep those  values that old America held dear and there seems to be a move to revert to some of those values in light of recent world events.

If that happens, there is no need to go into an uproar over it.  Everything happens in a continuous circle of change. Some things progress and at times they reverse themselves.

However there seems to be a need among some people to take to social media to try to chide or “correct” or discourage the behavior of an entertainer–whether that entertainer be a comic, actor, actress or musician and it comes from both sides of the political spectrum. “I think you’re picking on the president and/or his wife based on appearance, race, way of speaking, etc….”  the list goes on.  Often these people demand total silence from anyone who opposes the policies of the current political leaders in this country. They will attack fans who support them, and often throw up insult after insult on their fan pages. This is especially true on Facebook.   However when those of opposing view were in power, those who agreed with that point of view could care less what was put up about them–yet the opposition made the same jokes and such. Why? They realize it is pointless to try to battle over something nobody has any real control over.

Quite frankly, when it comes to entertainment and the arts, Voltaire had the right idea about all of it–“I may not agree with everything you say but I will defend to the death your right to say it.”

There will always be an audience for performers who have a fan base no matter how great or small. Most of those complaining are not fans of the acts and never were. When they start spewing vitriol, it only tells those that they are being hypocritical because on many of those pages they have to “like” the page of the person they are condemning in order to make a comment, and then they will post vitriol until they realize it does no good due to the fact that they are big fish in a little pond, OR until the admins of the pages ban and remove them. This is also true on the political pages.

If they keep trolling after that, then it is because they have a need to make themselves heard–just like an artist or politician that they are condemning. Taken in that sense, one could say that they are in the same club…Or can they? Either way, it shows those who think outside of the box how as a society, America has become well-known for its double standards.

Some fans even resort to attacking the fans for liking an artist.  Those are the ones who make fools of themselves by trying to win them over to their point of view when it absolutely will NOT happen. This is also true of people who support one person or another on the political pages. Ironically, in trying to box the fans and/or supporters of a person or group into a corner they end up putting themselves in one and it makes them look like they are true bullies, rather than intelligent human beings capable of conducting civil discourse.

By the same token, those who dislike an artist and/or the material in question have a right to express those views as well. They get enough of a bashing from those who aren’t fans for their behaviors that the opinion doesn’t make a difference. I have actually seen non-fans of artists support people that they are NOT fans of and defend them against trolls as well. Everyone has opinions and we all know what opinions are like.  I will not let either extreme dictate what they think I should or do not do. They do not live my life, I do. They don’t answer for my actions. I do. By the same token so do other entertainers, writers and politicians of all views and they should also bear these things in mind rather than take them personally. My father had a better piece of advice on such matters, and most have heard this before, “Consider the source.”

Besides all the above there is one basic fact of life that every entertainer or writer on Earth has learned one way or another and that is the fact that no one can please everyone, so why sweat bullets over it?

 

Political Correctness Truly Defined (My Not So Humble Opinion)…

Political correctness is the art of forcing a society to conform to a set of norms for a segment of the population that cannot deal with the normal processes of changing from a teenager into an adult. It is not about racism. That is a separate issue. It is not about misogyny. That is also a separate issue. It is also not about silencing religious views, which is still another issue.  However those pushing to monitor and control free speech are combining these issues in order to kill three birds with one stone so that they can live in a world that is only big enough for them to thrive on.

To be politically correct is to not have your own opinions on an issue that are not in agreement  with those who are writing the playbook. They will certainly be censored or omitted altogether. Your creativity will be subject to censorship and ridicule should you offend someone who is nothing more than a panty waist who cannot deal with the fact that not everyone will agree with their views.

It does not make the politically incorrect cowardly or dastardly when the opposition pushes this, it reveals those pushing it off on society as persecutors of those who espouse the U.S. Constitution.  In essence, those who push the “PC Movement” are cowards themselves. They fear what they hear rather than deal with the reality that they should be looking at.

The people should be setting the course for this nation–and I do not mean those in Hollywood. I mean the people as a whole. I also do not mean the powers that be. Why? Because all I have seen recently is failure and disappointment with their actions–or the lack of them.

 

 

As for me I’m with Voltaire on the issue: “I do not agree with what you have to say, but I’ll defend to the death your right to say it.”

Voltaire

 

 

I Simply Cannot Buy Rolling Stone Magazine…

Since this came out, I have not been able to even bring myself to purchase that magazine.

Since this came out, I have not been able to even bring myself to buy that magazine.

Once upon a time, there was a wonderful magazine that gave us articles about music and the music world–along with artists that were engaging in worthwhile pursuits at times. Then one day, someone decided to throw the very things that those of us who came to that magazine wanted to get away from, which includes depressing news and politics, in our faces.  However a person in charge of this magazine decided it would be appropriate to put a young man’s face on the cover who was the epitome of everything that is wrong in this country.  

“But what could possibly be wrong in this country?” some would think aloud.

“Complacency.” was the word that came to mind of others.

As a society, we have become far to complacent when it comes to what the media wants to subject us as an audience to.  If it were NEWS that would be one thing.  However in recent years, the media likes to bombard us with editorials. It gets really old. If I want someone’s opinion of what is going on in the world, I’ll simply ask them.  HOWEVER, when I want to know what is going on in this world, I only want the facts–and not their opinions of how they think these things should be or should not be.  Evidently the media no longer believes that we can make up our own minds on any issue,  so they try to tell us “how to think”…

We have also become far too complacent as a nation as to our own security.  Why do  I say that? Simple. Look around.  We’ve got teenagers going around targeting elderly people–especially if not of their own race, and yet no one DARES call that a hate crime IF the victim is white. IF the person who does it is white and the victim is black,  you can bet there will be serious jail time involved. This seriously leads me to question what truly is a hate crime if one group of  people who attack ANYONE due to race is not prosecuted while one person manages to get the collar… It is time to change that, people.  One form of racism does not justify another and if hate crime laws are not going to be equally prosecuted, they shouldn’t even be on the books. Justice is supposed to be blind–not subject to the whim of the US Attorney General or his boss. If one is really concerned about these young people getting hurt and killed for pulling such antics, then maybe the parents should step up to the plate and start monitoring who their kids are hanging out with again. Now back to my original topic…

Maybe IF this guy’s parents had done THAT much and kept their sons away from other radicals, they might not have ended up killing 4 people and wounding/maiming plenty of others. However, the mother isn’t too concerned about it given the clip below:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BqiinOlrc3o

Did you notice where he told her, “Don’t say anything.”  Why would he say that? That statement is out-of-place unless one is hiding something…Nice try. Russia even knew about her fanaticism. I think we know where these two men went wrong and it lies within their own mother. Sorry. She raised them to be as they are/were. She is more upset that they actually got caught in their own game, and if they had not done it, they wouldn’t have hijacked that Chinese boy’s car afterward to get away.  He will get the best defense on American soil money can buy. What I want to know is, who will hear the victims’ cries for justice as the blood calls out from their graves?

And this magazine seems to want to paint an empathetic picture of what is wrong with this guy, or am I mistaken? Sorry…I don’t buy into it and will no longer read Rolling Stone.

A Question Most Who Engage in this Will NOT Answer…

Why is it when a celebrity dies, there is some sort of envy that they were ever famous?  Better yet why do people feel the need to bring attention to themselves by slamming the fans who are grieving or putting posts up about who or what they feel focus should be on? Seriously…People need to get off of that self-elevating crap  because that is exactly what it is. It is not about anyone who died, it is about anyone who wants to bring attention to themselves by bashing those who are expressing sympathy for the celebrities‘ families and such.

This part is for those who feel the need to engage in such behavior in social media:  Look, if you don’t want celebrity status that is your choice. You chose your life path, and you are simply jealous of their recognition so you try to bring some to yourself by bashing them. They earned their status and whatever else came their way. If you are jealous of that, it is you that has the problem, not the celebrity (or late celebrity).  It doesn’t garner you much respect either. Either way, the fans identify with the celebrity they are grieving because they come into their homes or into the theaters and are visible to them. If they are musicians, they hear their words that touch their lives daily.

YOU want them to grieve the invisible–the ones they don’t see, but yet you seem to have a connection with. This is especially true when people post about troops that died on a celebrity death thread. That doesn’t mean the fans feel no regret for the loss of anyone–especially a soldier, sailor, airman, etc…But you have no right to tell anyone how they should feel or how they should express grief–let alone WHO they should grieve at any given time. You have no right to try to lay a guilt trip on them for your own pleasure either.

IF you want to grieve someone, put up your own tributes and leave the fans of the celebrities alone. You don’t help yourself by bashing them, belittling or bullying them either.  They are entitled to what they feel as are you.

For those wondering what the heck I am talking about, THIS appeared on FB the other day:

This is one example of what people will create to bring attention to themselves and cause crap...

This is one example of what people will create to bring attention to themselves and cause crap…The chances are, the person who created this didn’t know who Paul Walker or Roger Rodas were, but used this to bash fans with because he/she had nothing better to do with his/her time.

And just so everyone is aware, I have seen condolences posted toward both families on twitter, FaceBook and elsewhere…This behavior is inexcusable and immature–period.

The bottom line is that when anyone dies, they leave friends, family, co-workers and in the case of celebrities, a lot of fans and colleagues behind.  They are entitled to grieve in any way they see fit and if the people making such posts have a problem with that, they need to find another way to channel their negative energy or simply get quiet.

Then again, I am sure they will continue to engage in such behavior because it is far easier to bully a group from behind a keyboard than it is to say it to their faces, isn’t it?

Anyone Else Sick of the Westboro Baptist Hate Group?

Members of Westboro Baptist Church have been s...

Members of Westboro Baptist Church have been specifically banned from entering Canada for hate speech. Church members enter Canada, aiming to picket bus victim’s funeral (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Let’s see, we all know their utter hatred for any and all things outside of their own micro bubble–like the military, homosexuals, and anyone they feel truly entitled to cast the first stone at in the sin department.

Given their activity, I am starting to think that the Supreme Court needs to be investigated and given psychiatric evaluations for ruling that their hate speech is protected speech.  I truly question their competency to be fit for the bench in light of this. Anyone else would have been under federal investigation by now and CPS would be involved with as to how they are raising the children–and their speech would definitely NOT be protected..

I’m sick of this lot  and their self-righteous Pharisee like attitude.  They are no better than the bullies I actively crusade against and what makes my blood boil the most is that the government actually protects this homo-phobic, racist  ilk.  Yes they are racists! I’ve no seen one person of anything beside Caucasian descent in their pictures and videos.

I have a wonderful idea, and I’m sure it will go over like a lead balloon.  Why not drop them down in the middle of Syria or Iran and see how brave they are then?

Appropriate for this bunch of looneys...

Appropriate for this bunch of looneys…

The true face of emotional child abuse/neglect...I wouldn't be surprised if we and up having another "Waco" over this lot...

The true faces of emotional child abuse/neglect…I wouldn’t be surprised if we and up having another “Waco” over this lot…

 

This is No Country for Old Racists…Seriously!

I am going to say this again and again until those of a collectivist mindset gets it right…RACISM in all forms is WRONG. It should not be allowed to be taught in our culture–whether it be  in academics or in society. To raise children to be this way is abuse and should be treated as such. It does not matter if it is a professor or a school teacher, if they teach anything like that, they should be permanently barred from teaching in all 50 states and barred from  setting foot on ANY campus, and if they are here on a work visa, it should be immediately revoked and they should be sent home.

Now what sparked this you ask? Aside from the fact that my ancestors were here long before anyone of European descent–including Spaniards set foot on the place?  It was one statement by this man:

There should be no tolerance for this type of teaching at ANY level of education in America and teachers/professors with these views should not be in ANY educational post in this country.

There should be no tolerance for this type of teaching at ANY level of education in America and teachers/professors with these views should not be in ANY educational post in this country.  This is hate speech. It must be stamped out.

This gentleman, and I do use that term rather loosely for him, doesn’t seem to realize that not even his people–many of whom were also Spaniards who came to this continent are considered “white”.  Yes, he probably has them in his family tree…I have no tolerance for such bigotry. My grandson is part African American and I am part Comanche. For his information, my people were here long before anyone’s and yes there is Irish in my family tree but many were most likely indentured servants.

Anyone who supports this ilk is part of the problem in this country.  No artist in film or in the music industry should remain silent when these people are getting away with such hate speech. This is not about the parties anymore. It is about the people and these racists are like a cancer and must be weeded out and removed from their posts–period!  As long as these people have control of our colleges and children in the classrooms, there can never be unity because they seek to divide and conquer.

 

I Cannot Hold This Inside Any Longer

What I am about to say is probably going to upset people closest to me and at this point it does not matter.  I do not believe in living a lie and refuse to be pressured into going along with a mob mentality that is prevalent in the churches and in the streets.  I am an angry woman. I am angry because nobody in this country is taking care of their families and their own affairs before they put their nose into someone else’s business.

While I agree that the Constitution should be upheld, and the SOPA and RDAA rulings are nothing but a design to help enslave Americans, it is the public that is doing the job better than our government is.  America is becoming enslaved by the divisions within itself and it’s time to give BOTH major parties the boot… You have races hating each other for the color of their skin.  Neither party works to help Americans fix that. You have groups hating each other because they believe differently and you have groups hating women for having the courage to point these things out.   Yet nobody in our body of leaders wants to work to address the issues of the divisions that are destroying this nation. When I say “you” I am speaking of America as a people but if you are a bigoted individual,  you will know who you are by the end of this post.

You have Christians hating Atheists and Atheists hating Christians…Just to note:  A Christian who hates ANYONE is not a Christian and that goes for Rev. Wright, The Westboro Baptist Church and any other nut fringed and nut led religious group we hear about. Why not drop the labels and unite as Americans long enough to deal with the more important issues at hand, like keeping our basic rights to assembly, free speech and such in tact?  As long as those rights are kept in tact, this nation will remain strong but when those rights are removed, then this nation becomes in danger of being governed by those who crave absolute power and they will use the division of the American people to get it–and believe it or not, they are doing a damned good job at this point.

If people would mind their own business, believe what they want to and QUIT TRYING to force different belief systems on each other, we’d all be better off.  I am sick and tired of religion being pushed in school under the guise of “cultural education programs”.  IF you are going to teach foreign languages, they should be electives–not requirements. Most people will never live beyond US borders by their own choice so why force them to learn Arabic, Spanish or any other language they don’t want to learn? We certainly do not force anyone else to learn our language.  Make this all elective and save some tax dollars. But wait! That might make sense.

By the same token, I am tired of those who are in the extreme atheist fringe who sue to keep those of any faith out of political life. Yes, they are out there.  If there is to be true separation of church and state, then the Atheists cannot be allowed to force agendas either because of the free exercise clause.  The Constitution never gave anyone the right to not be offended whether they are of a faith or not. Solution: Stop the lawsuits and tell people to mind their own business because both groups pay taxes, therefore they can gripe and moan about whatever they want in public, and if they want to pray in public, it’s their business. Their taxes pay for their right to do so…

Now let’s discuss the thorn in every conservative’s side…Gay marriage.  No marriages are gay. In fact many married couples I know in the conservative world do nothing but argue and gripe about everyone else and are so miserable, I tell them they should get divorced.  They get pissed off because they say it’s “a sacred vow”–but I tell them if they don’t love each other, there is no more “vow” to break because they already broke the main one–you know–to the one where they said they would  “love, honor and cherish” each other? They really hate it when I point it out, but it’s messing up their kids to stay together in a situation like that.

If a same-sex couple wants to marry and such–let them.  IF the god of the bible is true, judgment will begin with the “House of God” and that means the Christians will get theirs long before anyone else.  Why bother?  It is not your job to tell anyone how to live. God (and yes I do believe in God) gave man a free will to choose his own path.  He also did not make you judge and the sole arbiter of one’s fate.  It’s certainly not my job to do his job.  That being said, I am closing with this clip from the “Ellen DeGeneres Show”.  She hit the nail on the head.  People really need to get over all this hatred because it is destroying this country, or as I should point out, what is left of it.

http://www.etonline.com/tv/118806_Ellen_DeGeneres_Slams_One_Million_Moms/index.html

People  will love this post or they’ll want to burn me at the stake for it and I do not care.  It is our children and grandchildren who will pay the price for this stupidity if people don’t knock it off in this country.  I see little appreciation from people for what our country’s founders created, and even less for those that sacrifice themselves to support it, but that’s a WHOLE new topic…Later…

Note:  I have many friends who are atheists, gays, etc…and they have no problem with my stand which is this: IF everyone is minding their OWN business and letting people be who they are, then we won’t end up putting our nose in another country’s affairs and telling them how to live because we’ll be too busy cleaning our own nation up first!  I hope it makes sense, but if  not, I’m used to it…

Reflections

Well, another year is all but gone and I am spending some time reflecting on my life and was transported back to one moment.  This was a time in my life where I was busy raising a family, and trying to find some purpose for my existence on this planet–that is, when I wasn’t raising hell over how self-centered people of my generation were and refusing to come out of my rabbit hole long enough to let anyone prove me wrong.  I literally was reclusive. I refused to go to theaters…Refused to go to concerts–with the exception of Duran Duran‘s for the simple fact that I liked how they had the balls to push the envelope and piss people off–e.g.–“Girls on Film“:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gudEttJlw3s  )  and don’t worry…This is the clean version.  I also like “Girl Panic” because if the critics are going to trash a Duran Duran video–it’s because they came up with something original and new that pisses ’em off all over again. I love it that the band has the cojones to keep pissing them off too.  Why? I’m not a musical purist.

Now it is 27 years later.  The world has drastically changed–and not for the better, really.  Too many people  do not mind their own business, too many countries are sticking their noses where it shouldn’t–ours included.  Some of the problems we saw from the 80’s on have only intensified.  Financial institutions are charging people to have access to THEIR OWN MONEY, which to me = theft.  Too many companies are charging exorbitant fees for using debit cards to pay a bill ($15-25 to make a payment using one is stupid!) and then whining if you say anything about it being “wrong”.

We see more people losing their homes while the political parties are too busy pointing fingers at each other, God, the unions, the weather and–well, you get the picture, I think.  Americans are not content to be simply Americans and unite behind a single cause–which that cause should be freedom from the corruption we see going on in the financial institutions and in the government. Oh NO! Everyone wants their own flags, holidays, and observance thereof.   IT is there. All sides know it but don’t want to face the fact that ALL parties are in on this crap because in the end, they want to be in charge of it!

They thrive on this division only I didn’t see this back in 1984.  This isn’t about left, right or any of that. It is about the very fact that as Americans we no longer unite long enough to accomplish anything.  Yet in one moment in 1984, I was given one glimpse of hope for us all as the human race, and it was when I saw this video and what the artists were doing!  For once a group stood united and brought a little change about in the world–or should I say in MY world?  That group was Band Aid.  Every artist in here and in the later edition which was made in 2010 were being genuine and it showed.

And in 1984, for one moment, I was reminded maybe the world isn’t such a bad place to take part in after all. Here is that video…

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w5cX_ncZLls&feature=results_video&playnext=1&list=PLEDA92BA6B09038AC

Later, I went back into my “rabbit hole” and stayed there until I decided to get my head out of my dark spot and grow up! That was in 2008. Do I regret that? No. Why? Because everything I have come to learn since I came back out in 2008 has put me right where I need to be WHEN I need to be there.  I believe that there is a Renaissance rather than an outright Revolution on the horizon.  People are learning.  This world is not like what I grew up in, and everyone in generations before has passed that bit of news to the next generation in line!  Being that I am going to be a grandmother–I suspect I’ll do the same thing! Have a great week!

Westboro Baptist Church–Political Organizations Should NOT be Tax Exempt!

My son came home from the war in Afghanistan almost 2 years ago.  There was a  point during which I wondered if I would ever really have him back, because he is not the same young man who left home.  Then today, someone pointed  out to me that he is here–just buried inside somewhere.  I think she is right.  Over the past couple of years, he has composed and played music again.  He can sing also.  That is one thing that this war cannot take from him–his passion for music.

He also has a love for animals–which is one thing this war could not change.  Here is a link to an interview he did with GQ while he was in Afghanistan.  I was upset when I read it, not because of the war itself, but it was because I could see in his own words what the war was doing to him.

http://www.gq.com/news-politics/big-issues/200904/obama-afghanistan-iraq-war-troops

It may have been my intuition but there were times I couldn’t sleep at night wondering if my boy was safe.   When he came home, I realized that he had been discharged a bit early–not by much.  I found out why a month later.  He was hurt when an IED exploded–killing others, but he survived.  He didn’t let the hospital tell us either because he knew he was going to live.  He said, “I didn’t want them to worry you, Mom.”  Right…He knew I worried anyway, but he knew I would have told my employer to take a hike if I had to and I would have been on the next military hop to Germany.

Now that he is back, he has been diagnosed with PTSD  and depression, along with some physical issues from the blast.  He can play piano as beautifully as he did before he left and he can still compose and sing.  These are the only two things that really give him a sense of purpose at the moment.  I intend to get him the program he wants to laying out his music on his computer as soon as I can get it.  I do not voice my opinions or show a lot of what I feel around him, but there is not much I won’t do for that young man who could have lost his life doing his duty.

Then there are those detractors who will go and protest a dead soldier’s funeral, but they don’t have the guts to show up to protest at a VFW fundraiser.  Why?  They have no cojones.   I am referring to those cult followers of the Westboro Baptist Church–and I shouldn’t call them a church because they are a political organization.  I feel that they should be audited and their tax exempt status revoked.  If they are receiving donated funds that are supposed to be used for charitable purposes, they should have to prove what they are using it for.  I also think that they are a modern-day cult at its worst.

Political rallies (which is what these protests are) are not EDUCATIONAL either if that is what they want to try to claim.  There is a huge difference between education and indoctrination.  Their own words condemn them as much as their actions.  They are a political organization spreading hate speech about military service members (many of whom die daily to protect their rights to act like fools), Jews and homosexuals–among other things.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Westboro_Baptist_Church

While Wikipedia is a good place to start, I am going to put images here that should seal the deal for revoking their status.  If any other preacher that is actually with the Baptist Convention (which none of the denominations claim this bunch) were to do this, the Federal Government would have taken swift action, so why has this so-called church NOT been audited?  They call Barack Obama the anti-christ and say all kinds of stuff that put them in the same league as Jeremiah Wright.  Too many of these nuts and fanatics, which is what they are, are crossing lines that people would face jail time over under Bill Clinton–that is for sure!  A charge called “sedition” would cover it if treason wouldn’t. First, here is my favorite message to that group the WBC:

Appropriate for this bunch of fanatics...

 

I don’t know about the rest of you, but this does not sound Christian to me…Just listen to it.  Then get back to me. Click play at the top left of the page.  It’s nothing but hate speech and crap from that WBC group–and for  this “parody” (If you can call it that) I am quite surprised that Lady Gaga has not sued yet.  As I stated, to me it is hate speech…I am no fan of hers, and I often criticize some of her antics but this is so depraved that I would not blame her if she did sue.

http://meganphelpsroper.tumblr.com/post/653165655/ever-burn-wbc-parody-of-lady-gagas

And then the WBC will  put children into the mix.  Can they be charged for this type of crap?

I think it is a travesty that my son and others who survived, as well as  the many sons and daughters who did not, have either been wounded or killed defending the rights of those who constantly spread hate speech about them.  Groups like this are a shame to this country and should be scrutinized if they are tax exempt.  I deal daily with watching my son’s struggle.  I promise you not ONE of these detractors will ever do this to a live soldier or show up to protest a VA function either.  They only protest the dead because they can’t defend themselves.  That makes these fanatics nothing more than cowards.

In the meantime, I am thankful every day for my son’s presence.  I still hug him even though he doesn’t like that as much as he did before he left.  He knows that it is  a “mom thing”.  I have lunch or dinner with my boys when I can.  I will say this, they are grown men, but I would lay down my life for them in a heartbeat.  They know it too.  I just wish they didn’t have to deal with today’s crap.  I don’t think any parent wants their kid to deal with what is going on in today’s world.  We never would have thought this possible even 10 years ago.

I do have some bad news for the Westboro Baptist Church, though.  It does say in every bible I have read that “…Judgment begins with the house of God…” That tells me that groups like this will get theirs long before anyone they condemn will if that is the case.

More on bullying…(Updated on 12/2/2011)

If you read my earlier blog on bullying, then what I am about to say may be of some surprise to you. Yes, I do feel that forgiving others enables us to move forward, but what about those that are broken and can take no more? I have my own ideas on this.

We have different types of bullying–but in all cases I feel that there is ONE common thread. Bullies go after anyone they perceive to be different and/or lesser than themselves. I think they feel empowered at someone else’s expense because either they have been bullied and now this is an outlet, or they simply feel that they are above anyone else. I also feel that all bullying can stem from resentment or hate.

Bullies are EVERYWHERE. They are in school and in the workplace. If you don’t believe me, look at all the lawsuits. Bullies all use different tactics. Some use physical violence (especially in schools) and others use either cyber bullying and/or they use a position of authority they have in the workplace to exert their will over those they perceive to be beneath their station. I also feel that bullies look at their victims as a step below the species of humanity on the evolutionary chain.

The abused tend to become abusers–but not always. Now substitute the words “The bullied” and “bullies” in that sentence. Bullying is a learned behavior–not an instinct or a mental disease. If you want to stop this in our society, then it has to be stopped at the schoolhouse first! To stop it in the schoolhouse, there are many ways–mediation, sensitivity training, etc…I think the best way is for school districts to hit the parents where it counts–their wallets. I’ll also bet, if a study were done, those conducting it would find out that the children who are bullies also had parents who were bullies when they were in school. Parents who were like that tend to dismiss their own children’s actions as “kids being kids”. This is simply false today. As I’ve said before, “kids being kids” will get people harmed physically and psychologically today–if not killed.

If districts could impose heavy fines (like $25 per offense) on parents whose children are out of control, the money could be used to do many things–fund classroom supplies so teachers won’t have to pay for it–etc…Face it–parents often don’t buy the kids what they need, so use the fines for “bullying” to provide things like pencils, paper, crayons, map colors, etc…Also parents love their pocketbooks enough that they will eventually control their children when they get tired of paying fines for their ridiculous behavior.

Kids who are bullies and get caught should also be suspended from extracurricular activities and sports for at least three weeks after each incident. For severe cases of physical bullying, charge the kids with assault because that is exactly what they are doing on school grounds! Some districts and state laws already allow for this, others do not.

Victims of severe and/or repeat bullying incidents should also be made to see a crisis counselor immediately after the incident is made known to school officials to make sure there are no suicidal thoughts or thoughts of harming others developing. Also, in less severe cases, transfer the bullies–NOT the victims. In fact, find out if the bullies are running in a clique and split them all up into different schools. When the cliques see that their buddies can’t go to school with them anymore, then they will back off of everyone else now.  If there is one thing a group hates it is having their social lives monkeyed with for someone’s actions.

It just seems to me that unless the case is extreme, transferring the victim should be a last resort–up to the parents. Why should the bullied child be punished? It would be more of a punishment to the bullies to separate their groups into different schools. It would also send a strong message to other students that there would be no tolerance for THEIR behavior. To me, transferring the victim is almost like punishing the victim. However, in the case of severe assault, or sexual assault of any kind, then I say move the victim to a new district to lessen psychological trauma and lock up the assailants in a juvenile facility.

Being bullied does not justify the victims taking the situation into their own hands and they need to be taught this. That is why it is important to get the victims to a counselor. When a person cannot take any more, they can become irrational and they can do things the normal person would not normally do–like harm others and/or themselves. I believe that we have to be proactive and not reactive when it comes to this subject. There are lives at stake and the last thing I want to hear about is another school shooting or bombing by some kid(or kids) who were victims of bullies who were themselves out of control.

The handling of bullying cases should be treated with no difference as to the reason behind the bullying. A bully is a bully and whether the victim is gay, straight, pretty, not pretty, athletic or not is not important here. All are created equal and should be treated no differently–whatever the reasoning behind it. This is true for the victim and the victimizer. All bullying is equally horrifying and I do not want to see it continue. I worked for 4.5 years as a corrections officer and spent over a year of it as a sergeant. Anyone can draw a parallel between the bullies who beat up kids for stepping into “their corner” of the playground and the offenders who will beat up other offenders for sitting at “their” tables or simply playing handball on “their part” of a recreation yard.

I also am a certified teacher. The same behavior exhibited by bullies in the school yards is also exhibited in the prison systems. IF you don’t believe me, then do a study. I’ll bet my last $10 that if a study is done comparing this behavior in the school with the behavior of the offenders who do this in the prisons, they will find so many similarities that it will shock them–especially when they find out how many of the schoolyard bullies are in families where one or more of its members are behind bars for violent crimes.

Our public schools should be a safe haven in America for these children, but to me it seems that they are growing in similarity to correctional facilities. At some schools, there are armed guards, fences, gates, etc…Is it any wonder that such a comparison can be made? What has happened in our culture that has made this so? I won’t go deeply into this subject here, but part of the problem lies in the devaluation of Education in America. We now have a culture that doesn’t view education as being necessary and important. Until power is given back to parents and educators to stop the mess going on–including the bullying–schools will continue to evolve into something reminiscent of correctional institutions. After all, it is teachers who try to instill social values into these children and they when grow up and get to the prison system–it’s up to the officers to do that. Am I right or wrong? I really want somebody to prove me wrong on this. I challenge anyone to do a study on it.

America really needs to start thinking and re-thinking. The clock is ticking and our children’s futures are at stake because of what society has done to them. The school system has to be changed. I think we should seriously take a look at overseas educational systems and find out what makes theirs different. What makes them work? Something is working well for them because you don’t see nearly the problems there that you see in our country now–especially school shootings and such. What are they doing right and what are we missing as a nation?

I have also thought that with all the new “Occupy” protests, that maybe parents should “Occupy” their children’s schools.  I do not see why parents cannot volunteer to monitor the hallways and such.   For students who must walk to their home from the bus or from the school, set up parent patrols to walk the kids home and ensure their safety.

There is one more thing that one might look into in order to make comparisons and ensure accountability on the part of the school administrations.   Here is my proposal.  The Prison Rape Elimination Act (or PREA) was passed in 2003.  It was written specifically to deal with victims of sexual assault in correctional facilities but it has expanded over the years to include offenders who are victims of extortion, beatings and to provide protections for offenders who have become suicidal.  You can read a little about this act here:  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Prison_Rape_Elimination_Act_of_2003  .

What does this have to do with school bullying?  Well, here is my perspective.  I feel that if a study were done on this, I would be proven right.  IF an offender commits suicide, there is always an  investigation into that.  If it comes out that officers or administrators ignored the signs of offenders being abused and/or made remarks to the offender like “Welcome to prison!” or “You shouldn’t have committed the crime you did to end up here!”, then the officer(s) and/or administrator(s) who failed to get help for the victim can be charged with deliberate indifference–and get jail time for it on top of losing their position.

I feel that if a study were done, many of the offenders who attack other offenders were probably either school bullies, victims of school bullies  and/or victims of abuse or neglect at home.  Now if the federal government were to expand the PREA to include public education facilities, it would open up the door for teachers and administrators who fail to protect victims criminally liable for their lack of action when it comes to protecting our young victims.

America has a growing population of gang related offenses and bullies in the public school system who have learned this behavior from family members, or have learned it by being exposed to family members who are incarcerated.  I feel that IF a study were done, there would be a strong connection here.  I really want someone to prove me wrong on this, but I do not think it will happen because the suicide rate among bullying victims is steadily climbing.  Cyber bullying and psychological terrorizing of children is becoming more common.

Since public school attendance is mandatory in this country, I have reached the conclusion that schools are no longer a safe haven for children to be educated in, but have become facilities for containment–much like the correctional facilities given the behaviors mimicked by bullies, teachers, administrators, offenders and officers–plus the upper administrations in both types of facilities.   When administrators tell parents, “Well bullying is part of school life and your child needs to learn to deal with it.”  This  is no different from telling an offender who is assaulted “Welcome to prison!”.  Do you see the connection I am making here?

We send our innocent children into public school facilities around the country with no protection given to them every single day because by law, we must do so. It is the only federally mandated institution forced upon our children, who have NEVER committed a crime or hurt anyone–yet they are getting hurt.  They are dying every day.   However, when the school systems fail to provide for the safety and well-being of those children in their care, it becomes a problem that can only be addressed by stronger regulation and litigation.  Schools that have not implemented a “Zero Tolerance” Policy for bullying, must be forced to do so and forced to enforce it.  It has to include stipulations about being caught for cyber-bullying as well.  If student’s cell phones and such have to be banned from schools, then so be it.  They aren’t allowed to have these things in a prison, so why would they be allowed here?