I had to ask this. I don’t know why I am down right now, but for some reason, I went through a phase tonight where all I could do mourn for a person who died to me 2 years ago…No, he’s not physically dead but he might as well be because I have no intention of letting him back into my life. I visualized putting flowers into the sea and watching them drift into the sea as I said, “Nevermore”. Yes, I know that is what the Raven said, but for some reason my heart felt very heavy tonight and it surrounded him.
A friend then urged me to call him to which I replied, “What the hell for? There is no point.” Well my friend says that this guy keeps asking about me. So what? I don’t want him back. He chose to be where he is. He can stay there.
Then I get told, “Well you should call him. Once you call him and the dust settles you’ll feel better.”
I felt better the day I said goodbye to him. I will not go back ten steps when I am moving forward and my career is going well. To let him back into my life in any capacity would only set me backwards. I do not need that–not now–not ever. Had he been genuine and not leading everyone around him (including his family) with false promises and lies, it would be different.
The sun is rising on a new day and I am going to sleep now. I will not dream of him. Why? He doesn’t break my heart any longer but I know that he is breaking someone else’s–but the lies he lives are his own. So now I ask for his next victim, “Does a broken heart ever heal?”
I will also answer it here: “Yes it does. Give it time. You’ll still think of the person once in a while, but the pain of the old relationship is not worth returning to. It will pass. Just leave that person where he or she belongs–out of the picture of your future, which is what I had to do. With that person there would be no future to speak of anyhow. I know this from personal experience.”